From the memoir: Malala recounts her first visit to Pakistan after the attempt on her life
An excerpt from Finding My Way, by Malala Yousafzai.
When I arrived in Birmingham for spring break, I told my dad we needed to go to Pakistan. If my college friends could visit the country on their holidays, I should have that right too. I was growing impatient; it seemed if it didn’t happen now, it never would.
“Let’s put it off until summer,” he said.
“If you want to wait, that’s fine. I’ll go on my own,” I shot back, daring him. “I will book my own flight, leave this house in a cab, and call Moniba when I land to pick me up.” Deep down, I knew I wasn’t that bold, but I wasn’t sure my dad knew it—which might give me some leverage.
Every time, the answer was the same: “It’s not the right moment for Malala’s return.” My dad had heard it so often I feared he was giving up.
“It will never be the ‘right’ moment!” I railed, trying to pass on my frustration. “I am a Pakistani citizen with a valid passport. They have no grounds to stop me.”
I sounded angry, but inside, my heart was breaking. At 24 Observatory Road, I’d had more reminders of home—food, music, sports, language—in a few weeks than in five years. Now that awakening felt painful, like blood rushing back into numb limbs.
I was done following old friends on Facebook, done walking the streets on Google Maps. I couldn’t keep dreaming of home at night and waking up confused every morning.
Summary: Malala shares her emotional struggle and determination to return to Pakistan, despite the obstacles and delays imposed on her journey home.